When you said “I do,” you had visions of marital bliss. You imagined that you and your spouse were going to walk happily ever after into the sunset.
But shortly, after you got married, things changed. Little things he said infatuated you.
You both feel like 2 ships passing in the night. It’s like both of you are speaking a foreign language. You’ve tried everything to fix its but it’s just not working.
Never fear, marriage counseling is a great way to reclaim your friendship with your spouse, learn how to communicate clearly and learn how to manage conflict without pain.
Here’s how to find an amazing marriage counselor in the Murrieta/Temecula area (or pretty much anywhere you live).
1) Ask your friends, family or loved ones for a referral for marriage counseling
Chances are you know at least one person who has spoken to a couples therapist or marriage counselor before. Marriage counseling is much more common than you think. Although there is still quite a bit of stigma around going to see a therapist, I assure you that therapy is a great way to improve your relationship and work towards the amazing marriage you’ve dreamed of for such a long time.
One of the simplest ways to find a couples therapist is to go to a therapist who has helped someone you know. Ask your friends what they liked about their couples therapist, what they didn’t like about the therapist, what the therapist’s style is like and what you can expect if you decide to see her fo marriage counseling.
This is a great way to determine whether that therapist will be a good fit for you.
Once you get the referrals, schedule a free consultation call with that that therapist, so you can get a sense of her vibe. It is very important that your therapist is an amazing fit for both you and your spouse.
2) Search for marriage counseling or a couples therapist on Google
These days you can pretty much find anything online. Because Google is the number 1 search engine out there, it’s also a great resource for finding someone who can help you with marriage counseling in Murrieta or marriage counseling in Temecula.
To increase your options, you could also consider virtual marriage or couples counseling (which can be just as effective as in person couples therapy). Expand your search to pretty much any city within your state. Marriage counselors and licensed marriage and family therapists are licensed to be able to see everyone within their state. That means, if you live in Murrieta, you don’t just have to see a marriage counselor in Murrieta. You could see a couples therapist in Los Angeles, San Diego, Sacramento, or any city in California.
Your options are limitless.
Consider typing the following search terms in Google:
Marriage counseling Murrieta
Marriage counseling Temecula
Marriage counseling in Riverside
Marriage therapist Murrieta
Couples therapist Murrieta
Couples counseling in Temecula
Relationship counseling Los Angeles
If you want to narrow your search, you can be even more specific. For example, if you’re looking for a Black, Christian couples therapist, you can type in:
Black couples therapist Murrieta
Christian couples counseling Temecula
Female Black therapist Murrieta
Scroll through the therapist’s website, read the words on the page and pick about 3 therapists you feel a connection with. Once this is done, it’s time to schedule that free consultation call so that you can ask the therapist or counselor any questions you have and find out more about the way they work.
Remember, it’s your session, so you deserve to see a therapist you are comfortable with.
3 ) Look for a couples therapist or marriage counseling on a therapy directory
Therapy and mental health directories are a great way to find a couples therapist. You can narrow your search by:
Therapist’s gender
Therapist’s specialty (couples counseling, infidelity, infertility, anxiety, women’s issues, etc.)
Therapist’s location and zip code
Cost of services
Therapist’s faith
Language the therapist’s speaks
The types of therapy that the therapist utilizes (some therapists specialize in Gottman Therapy, Imago Therapy, Emotionally Focused Therapy and some use Prepare-Enrich).
After narrowing down the search terms, pick about 5 therapists you are drawn to. Read their profiles and further narrow down your search to 3 therapists.
The next step is to reach out to the therapists to schedule a free consultation call. On the call you’ll get a better sense of the therapist’s personality, her approach to therapy and whether or not you and your spouse will be a great fit for her.
Here’s where it’ll be important to trust your gut. Go with the person who feels like the best fit for you and your partner.
In the event that it doesn’t work out, it’s okay to break up with your therapist and find someone else. Keep trying until you find the right therapist.
Some mental health directories to try:
There are tons of therapy and counseling directories out there. Here are a few you could try:
If you are looking to regain the connection and friendship you had with your spouse and stop the endless cycle of arguments, I’m a Christian therapist who provides marriage counseling in the Murrieta/Temecula area. I also work online with clients throughout California.
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About the Author
My name is Ibinye Osibodu-Onyali. I’m a licensed marriage and family therapist in California. I help women who are struggling with anxiety and insomnia.
I also help couples learn how to speak each other’s language, date each other again and manage conflict in a non-painful way.
Many of my clients are: